Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Songs that I Think Are Fake

There are all of these super famous songs that no one actually knows. You might know one line of it, which is usually just the title sung to some vague melody that you aren't too sure about. You only ever hear snippets of these songs, like in the background of a movie. I don't think those songs are real songs. I think someone just wrote those snippets and that's it, and now everyone thinks they are parts of actual songs. They keep putting them in movies and people keep thinking they are real, but it's all a big lie. Songs like:

1. "That's Amore" - No way is this a real song; it was clearly invented to have something to play in Italian restaurants in films.

2. The Canadian National Anthem - I'm pretty sure there's nothing after "Oh, Canada!"

3. "I Left My Heart in San Francisco" - Can anyone tell me any words to this song other than the title? Yeah, that's what I thought.

4. "Zat You, Santa Claus?" - This song is clearly just a bunch of generic brass instruments playing to provide background music for family-friendly Christmas movies, then the one line is sung very loudly to mark the end of the holiday shopping/decorating/ice skating montage.

I think it would be genius to have a karaoke bar where the entire playlist consists only of songs like this.

This is unrelated, but I also wanted to point out that it's really gross to bring your dog into the grocery store. Why do people do this? Anything that pees to mark its territory should not be brought around human food items.

TTFN,

S. Misanthrope

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