Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Three Simple Proofs that Babies are Gross

Take your pick.

Proof #1:
A. Things that are covered in viruses, bacteria, parasites, fungi and other microbes are gross.
B. Babies are covered in viruses, bacteria, parasites, fungi and other microbes.
--> Babies are gross.

Proof #2:
A. Things that lack bowel control are gross.
B. Things that lack bladder control are gross.
C. Babies lack bowel and bladder control.
--> Babies are gross.

Proof #3:
A. Vaginas are gross.
B. Babies come from vaginas.
--> Babies are gross.

You're welcome.

S. Misanthrope

5 comments:

  1. In order for proof 3 to be logically valid, premise 1 should be changed to "things that come from vaginas are gross."

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  2. This is why the peer review process exists. We, as a species, move ever closer to Truth.

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  3. Penises are objectively significantly more gross after they come out of vaginas than before they went in.

    ReplyDelete
  4. For the record, I did not come out of a vagina, nor was I ever a baby. I sprang fully-grown from my father's head.

    ReplyDelete